The Five Essential Qualities of Dadness

Every dad is one of a kind, but we’ve been having a chat and we reckon there are at least five things that make up a classic dad.

Without our dads, many of us wouldn’t know how to change a tyre, or BBQ burgers to ‘perfection’ (his words). We definitely wouldn’t know where to start when it comes to buying the right tools or hanging curtain poles. Where do they learn this stuff? Is there a secret Dad school, with an endless supply of tea and a classic rock jukebox? Father’s Day 2021 is coming up on Sunday 20th June, so we’re thinking about the ‘dadisms’ that kids everywhere know all too well. Does your dad score five out of five?

Nodding off – and snoring – on the sofa

There’s nothing better than getting the snacks in, plonking yourselves on the sofa and watching a film with dad. His death grip on the remote means the volume will be ear-splitting, and the movie will be mostly high-speed chases and angry men with sore throats, but that’s okay because time spent with dad is always enjoyable. That is until he’s fast asleep and managing, somehow, to drown out Jason Statham’s finest with his snoring.

Taking BBQs way too seriously

Even when the temperature’s reading the wrong side of 0, if the sun’s just about visible through the clouds, it’s apron on, tongs in hand, and charcoal bag on the BBQ. None of that gas grill rubbish. According to dad it’s a waste of a ‘sunny’ day without meat, an array of high-tech gadgets, and a cooler filled with bottled beer and soft drinks. Let’s be honest though, if he wants to stand out there in the drizzle making delicious food, we can only stand to benefit. Grill on, dad.

Telling dad jokes

Some things never change, and dads telling embarrassing jokes at the most inopportune moments (i.e. any time) is one of them. We can roll our eyes all we like, but the dad jokes are here to stay, and we’ll never admit it to him but we’d miss them if they were gone.

The good news is, your dad is not the only one who makes his kids cringe in front of their friends or new partner; it’s a common trait of dads all over the world. The bad news is that dad jokes are highly catching; you will find yourself making a dad joke at some point. That’s when he’ll know his work is done.

 

Asking about your car

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve just got a new job, proposed to your partner, bought a new house or invented time travel; dads need to know, first and foremost, whether your car is running well.

Have you checked the oil? When did you last take it to the garage? No not that one, they don’t know what they’re talking about there. Did you get the wheels realigned in the end? More often than not dad’ll help himself to the bonnet and begin poking around. If you’re lucky, he might even top up your engine coolant while he’s at it! If you want to give your dad a chuckle, send him our guide to what your car says about you, and prepare for some big opinions in return!

Obnoxiously loud sneezing

It’s a well-known fact that dads are physically incapable of sneezing quietly. At best, dad’s thunderous sneezes have scared the living daylights out of us, and at worst they’ve ruined a crucial movie scene or started an avalanche. Truly one of life’s unsolvable mysteries, the unnecessarily loud dad sneeze is undeniably hilarious, and part of the cacophony of dad noises we learn to love. We shan’t mention the others.

We can’t help but love the funny things our dads do – so make sure you tell him how much you appreciate his burger-flipping, car-fixing, bad-joking dadness with a perfect Father’s Day card.