The Many Kinds of Dad: A Spotter’s Guide

Dads come in many different varieties, and using our handy Father’s Day dad-spotting guide, you’ll be able to recognise the different species of dad in the wild. If you’re lucky, you might even spot them at home in their natural habitats!

A word of warning though: dads are easily spooked, and you should never approach one without the safety precautions of a cup of tea and a comment about the weather.

The DIY dad

Often found in cellars, garages or other rooms lit by a single bare lightbulb, DIY dads are recognisable by their tiny battery-powered FM radios and paint-stained jeans. From plumbing to woodwork, car engines to painting and decorating, these dads are ‘expert’ handymen. Oh sure, they might occasionally hang a wonky shelf or put a door on upside down, but DIY dads are always there when we need them. They’re no strangers to hard work, and enjoy nothing more than imparting their wisdom when it comes to drill bits and tool kits.

Listen out for: ‘Ooof, I tell you what, my knees…’

The workaholic dad

The workaholic dad is usually adorned with suit and tie, and can be seen most often answering important emails or taking work calls. Brimming with advice about interviews, cover letters, and when to help yourself to the meeting room sandwiches, the workaholic dad sometimes appears to be all work no play. But don’t let appearances fool you, when this dad lets their hair down it’s truly a sight to behold. Ambitious, driven and successful, the workaholic dad wants the best for his children, and is sure to help them with homework, exam revision and career development – even if they don’t ask for advice! 

Listen out for: ‘Why does it have to install updates now?!’

The hipster dad

The natural habitat of the hipster dad is a cool coffeehouse or independent café, though they can often be spotted reading an obscure novel while their children play in the park, creche or leisure centre. Easy to identify thanks to their well-oiled beards, fisherman’s hats, band t-shirts, tattoos, and trademark moustaches, hipster dads are super stylish, and their children are always the trendiest in the class.

Listen out for: ‘Yeah, I’ve been spending a lot of time with Dostoyevsky recently. No no, not the author, that’s what I named my son. Dosty for short.’

The helicopter dad

The helicopter dad is so called because he is always hovering, lovingly fussing over his children while they play on the swings or kick around a football in the park. Caring, reliable and over-protective to the last, the helicopter dad’s trademark hover makes him easy to pick out of a crowd, and he is sure to always be on hand with a first aid kit in case of an emergency. 

Listen out for: ‘I’m sure I had disinfectant for duck bites in here somewhere…’

The proud dad

Often seen at the pub showing bored mates pictures from his kids’ graduations, weddings or just Tuesdays, the proud dad will never miss an opportunity to brag about his children and their successes. While we’re sure his friends and colleagues are sick to the back teeth of his boasting, the proud dad simply cannot contain his amazement that he ended up with such wonderful kids. And while he’s kind of embarrassing sometimes, we must admit that it’s always nice to know our dad is proud of us.

Listen out for: ‘Oh no wait, this was last year’s dentist appointments! The photos from this year are even better, hang on a sec…’

This concludes our safari for now. What kind of dad do you have? No matter his ‘dad vibe’, he’s sure to appreciate a funny Father’s Day card from thortful. With literally thousands of cards to choose from, you’ll definitely find one that’s perfect for yours.

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